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‘Girl math’ may not be smart financial advice, but it could help women feel more empowered with money

<div class="theconversation-article-body"><em><a href="https://theconversation.com/profiles/ylva-baeckstrom-1463175">Ylva Baeckstrom</a>, <a href="https://theconversation.com/institutions/kings-college-london-1196">King's College London</a></em></p> <p>If you’ve ever calculated cost per wear to justify the price of an expensive dress, or felt like you’ve made a profit after returning an ill-fitting pair of jeans, you might be an expert in <a href="https://www.standard.co.uk/news/world/girl-maths-tiktok-trend-its-basically-free-b1100504.html">“girl math”</a>. With videos about the topic going viral on social media, girl math might seem like a silly (<a href="https://www.glamourmagazine.co.uk/article/girl-math-womens-spending-taken-seriously">or even sexist</a>) trend, but it actually tells us a lot about the relationship between gender, money and emotions.</p> <p>Girl math introduces a spend classification system: purchases below a certain value, or made in cash, don’t “count”. Psychologically, this makes low-value spending feel safe and emphasises the importance of the long-term value derived from more expensive items. For example, girl math tells us that buying an expensive dress is only “worth it” if you can wear it to multiple events.</p> <p>This approach has similarities to <a href="https://www.investopedia.com/terms/m/modernportfoliotheory.asp">portfolio theory</a> – a method of choosing investments to maximise expected returns and minimise risk. By evaluating how each purchase contributes to the shopping portfolio, girl math shoppers essentially become shopping portfolio managers.</p> <h2>Money and emotions</h2> <p>People of all genders, rich or poor, feel anxious when dealing with their personal finances. Many people in the UK do not understand pensions or saving enough to <a href="https://www.ons.gov.uk/employmentandlabourmarket/peopleinwork/workplacepensions/articles/pensionparticipationatrecordhighbutcontributionsclusteratminimumlevels/2018-05-04">afford their retirement</a>. Without motivation to learn, people avoid dealing with money altogether. One way to find this motivation, as girl math shows, is by having an emotional and tangible connection to our finances.</p> <p>On the surface, it may seem that women are being ridiculed and encouraged to overspend by using girl math. From a different perspective, it hints at something critical: for a person to really care about something as seemingly abstract as personal finance, they need to feel that they can relate to it.</p> <p>Thinking about money in terms of the value of purchases can help create an <a href="https://www.thetimes.co.uk/article/every-time-i-use-my-card-my-phone-buzzes-and-that-stops-me-shopping-ps0fjx6nj">emotional relationship</a> to finance, making it something people want to look after.</p> <figure><iframe src="https://www.youtube.com/embed/GPzA7B6dcxc?wmode=transparent&amp;start=0" width="440" height="260" frameborder="0" allowfullscreen="allowfullscreen"></iframe></figure> <h2>The girl math we need</h2> <p>Women are a consumer force to be reckoned with, controlling <a href="https://www.forbes.com/sites/bridgetbrennan/2015/01/21/top-10-things-everyone-should-know-about-women-consumers/#7679f9d6a8b4">up to 80%</a> of consumer spending globally. The girl math trend is a demonstration of women’s mastery at applying portfolio theory to their shopping, making them investment powerhouses whose potential is overlooked by the financial services industry.</p> <p><a href="https://www.theguardian.com/world/2019/oct/28/women-paid-less-than-men-over-careers-gender-pay-gap-report">Women are disadvantaged</a> when it comes to money and finance. Women in the UK earn on average £260,000 less than men during their careers and the retirement income of men is twice as high as women’s.</p> <p>As I’ve found in <a href="https://www.routledge.com/Gender-and-Finance-Addressing-Inequality-in-the-Financial-Services-Industry/Baeckstrom/p/book/9781032055572">my research</a> on gender and finance, women have lower financial self-efficacy (belief in their own abilities) compared to men. This is not helped by women feeling patronised when seeking financial advice.</p> <p>Because the world of finance was created by men for men, its language and culture are <a href="https://www.routledge.com/Gender-and-Finance-Addressing-Inequality-in-the-Financial-Services-Industry/Baeckstrom/p/book/9781032055572">intrinsically male</a>. Only in the mid-1970s did women in the UK gain the legal right to open a bank account without a male signature and it was not until 1980 that they could apply for credit independently. With the law now more (<a href="https://www.worldbank.org/en/news/press-release/2023/03/02/pace-of-reform-toward-equal-rights-for-women-falls-to-20-year-low">but not fully</a>) gender equal, the financial services industry has failed to connect with women.</p> <p>Studies show that 49% of women are <a href="https://www.ellevest.com/magazine/disrupt-money/ellevest-financial-wellness-survey">anxious about their finances</a>. However they have not bought into patronising offers and <a href="https://www.fa-mag.com/news/gender-roles-block-female-financial-experience--ubs-says-73531.html">mansplaining by financial advisers</a>. This outdated approach suggests that it is women, rather than the malfunctioning financial system, <a href="https://www.theguardian.com/commentisfree/2020/sep/16/women-are-not-financially-illiterate-they-need-more-than-condescending-advice">who need fixing</a>.</p> <p>Women continue to feel that they do not belong to or are able to trust the world of finance. And why would women trust an industry with a <a href="https://www.ons.gov.uk/employmentandlabourmarket/peopleinwork/earningsandworkinghours/bulletins/genderpaygapintheuk/2019">gender pay gap</a> of up to 59% and a severe lack of women in senior positions?</p> <p>Girl math on its own isn’t necessarily good financial advice, but if it helps even a handful of women feel more empowered to manage and understand their finances, it should not be dismissed.</p> <p><!-- End of code. If you don't see any code above, please get new code from the Advanced tab after you click the republish button. The page counter does not collect any personal data. More info: https://theconversation.com/republishing-guidelines --></p> <p><em><a href="https://theconversation.com/profiles/ylva-baeckstrom-1463175">Ylva Baeckstrom</a>, Senior Lecturer in Finance, <a href="https://theconversation.com/institutions/kings-college-london-1196">King's College London</a></em></p> <p><em>Image credits: Getty Images </em></p> <p><em>This article is republished from <a href="https://theconversation.com">The Conversation</a> under a Creative Commons license. Read the <a href="https://theconversation.com/girl-math-may-not-be-smart-financial-advice-but-it-could-help-women-feel-more-empowered-with-money-211780">original article</a>.</em></p> </div>

Money & Banking

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Spice Girls reunite for Victoria Beckham's 50th birthday

<p>The Spice Girls have reunited and performed one of their most iconic songs at Victoria Beckham's lavish 50th birthday party. </p> <p>The birthday bash – which cost an estimated $480,000 – was hosted at Oswald’s, a private members’ restaurant in London, with all five Spice Girls, plus host of star guests, including Tom Cruise and Eva Longoria in attendance. </p> <p>David Beckham took to Instagram to share what Spice Girls fans have been dying to see - a video of the girl group singing and dancing to "Stop". </p> <p>“I mean come on x," he captioned the post. </p> <blockquote class="instagram-media" style="background: #FFF; border: 0; border-radius: 3px; box-shadow: 0 0 1px 0 rgba(0,0,0,0.5),0 1px 10px 0 rgba(0,0,0,0.15); margin: 1px; max-width: 540px; min-width: 326px; padding: 0; width: calc(100% - 2px);" data-instgrm-captioned="" data-instgrm-permalink="https://www.instagram.com/reel/C6AWKeaoENX/?utm_source=ig_embed&amp;utm_campaign=loading" data-instgrm-version="14"> <div style="padding: 16px;"> <div style="display: flex; flex-direction: row; align-items: center;"> <div style="background-color: #f4f4f4; border-radius: 50%; flex-grow: 0; height: 40px; margin-right: 14px; width: 40px;"> </div> <div style="display: flex; flex-direction: column; flex-grow: 1; justify-content: center;"> <div style="background-color: #f4f4f4; border-radius: 4px; flex-grow: 0; height: 14px; margin-bottom: 6px; width: 100px;"> </div> <div style="background-color: #f4f4f4; border-radius: 4px; flex-grow: 0; height: 14px; width: 60px;"> </div> </div> </div> <div style="padding: 19% 0;"> </div> <div style="display: block; height: 50px; margin: 0 auto 12px; width: 50px;"> </div> <div style="padding-top: 8px;"> <div style="color: #3897f0; font-family: Arial,sans-serif; font-size: 14px; font-style: normal; font-weight: 550; line-height: 18px;">View this post on Instagram</div> </div> <div style="padding: 12.5% 0;"> </div> <div style="display: flex; flex-direction: row; margin-bottom: 14px; align-items: center;"> <div> <div style="background-color: #f4f4f4; border-radius: 50%; height: 12.5px; width: 12.5px; transform: translateX(0px) translateY(7px);"> </div> <div style="background-color: #f4f4f4; height: 12.5px; transform: rotate(-45deg) translateX(3px) translateY(1px); width: 12.5px; flex-grow: 0; margin-right: 14px; margin-left: 2px;"> </div> <div style="background-color: #f4f4f4; border-radius: 50%; height: 12.5px; width: 12.5px; transform: translateX(9px) translateY(-18px);"> </div> </div> <div style="margin-left: 8px;"> <div style="background-color: #f4f4f4; border-radius: 50%; flex-grow: 0; height: 20px; width: 20px;"> </div> <div style="width: 0; height: 0; border-top: 2px solid transparent; border-left: 6px solid #f4f4f4; border-bottom: 2px solid transparent; transform: translateX(16px) translateY(-4px) rotate(30deg);"> </div> </div> <div style="margin-left: auto;"> <div style="width: 0px; border-top: 8px solid #F4F4F4; border-right: 8px solid transparent; transform: translateY(16px);"> </div> <div style="background-color: #f4f4f4; flex-grow: 0; height: 12px; width: 16px; transform: translateY(-4px);"> </div> <div style="width: 0; height: 0; border-top: 8px solid #F4F4F4; border-left: 8px solid transparent; transform: translateY(-4px) translateX(8px);"> </div> </div> </div> <div style="display: flex; flex-direction: column; flex-grow: 1; justify-content: center; margin-bottom: 24px;"> <div style="background-color: #f4f4f4; border-radius: 4px; flex-grow: 0; height: 14px; margin-bottom: 6px; width: 224px;"> </div> <div style="background-color: #f4f4f4; border-radius: 4px; flex-grow: 0; height: 14px; width: 144px;"> </div> </div> <p style="color: #c9c8cd; font-family: Arial,sans-serif; font-size: 14px; line-height: 17px; margin-bottom: 0; margin-top: 8px; overflow: hidden; padding: 8px 0 7px; text-align: center; text-overflow: ellipsis; white-space: nowrap;"><a style="color: #c9c8cd; font-family: Arial,sans-serif; font-size: 14px; font-style: normal; font-weight: normal; line-height: 17px; text-decoration: none;" href="https://www.instagram.com/reel/C6AWKeaoENX/?utm_source=ig_embed&amp;utm_campaign=loading" target="_blank" rel="noopener">A post shared by David Beckham (@davidbeckham)</a></p> </div> </blockquote> <p>Fans were over the moon and even British supermodel Adwoa Aboah commented: “What dreams are made of!”</p> <p>“David you are the best social media manager out there, thank you for giving the people CONTENT,” one fan wrote. </p> <p>“I am crying happy tears! OMG! I love Spice Girls so freaking much! Happy birthday, Victoria!” another commented. </p> <p>“The moment the entire planet has been waiting for,” a third added. </p> <p>"The way a whole generation is SHAKING," commented a fourth. </p> <p>Just last month, during an appearance on UK talk show <em>Loose Women</em>, Mel B hinted at a Spice Girls reunion of some kind, which she said would "definitely" be happening this year. </p> <p>“We are definitely doing something,” she told co-host Christine Lampard.</p> <p>“I’m probably going to get told off (for revealing that), but I’ve said it. There you go. I’m in trouble now.”</p> <p><em>Images: Instagram</em></p> <p> </p> <p> </p>

TV

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Queen Camilla's hilarious reaction to becoming a Royal Barbie Girl

<p>In a moment that could only happen in the whimsical world of royalty, Queen Camilla found herself face-to-face with an unexpected miniature version of herself during a reception at Buckingham Palace.</p> <p>But this wasn't just any Barbie doll; it was a bespoke creation, meticulously crafted in Her Majesty's likeness, complete with her signature style and regal flair!</p> <p>The Queen's reaction was nothing short of priceless, as she quipped that the designers had managed to shave off a good few decades from her appearance. "You've taken about 50 years off my life," she joked, "we should all have a Barbie."</p> <p>One can only imagine the possibilities if all it took to turn back the clock was a custom-made doll! However, the hilarity didn't end there. Despite the uncanny resemblance between Queen Camilla and her plastic counterpart, there was a slight wardrobe mishap that caught Her Majesty's discerning eye.</p> <p>It seems she had inadvertently misplaced her WOW badge, wearing it on her dress instead of her cape, unlike her miniature twin. Oh, the horror of a mismatched ensemble in the halls of Buckingham Palace! One can only imagine the flurry of royal assistants scrambling to rectify the situation, lest the fashion police be summoned.</p> <p>But among the giggles and guffaws, Queen Camilla seized the opportunity to reflect on a more profound message, delving into the history of women's rights and the symbolism of two stones preserved from a 1914 suffragette protest. As she eloquently put it, "These stones were picked up and handed to Queen Mary, who decided to keep them for posterity. I thought today we might, to quote Shakespeare, find 'sermons in stones'."</p> <p>Indeed, the juxtaposition of a miniature Barbie and historical artefacts provided a reminder of the progress made in the fight for gender equality, while also serving as a testament to the timeless spirit of hope and resilience embodied by women throughout history.</p> <p>In the end, Queen Camilla's encounter with her Barbie alter ego may have been a lighthearted affair, but it also served as a reminder that even in the most regal of settings, laughter and humility are never far from reach. After all, who says queens can't have a little fun with their plastic doppelgängers?</p> <p><em>Images: Getty / YouTube</em></p>

Beauty & Style

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"Flower grannies" at their grandkids' wedding go viral

<p>Two grandmothers have stolen the show at their grandkids' wedding as they walked down the aisle as flower girls. </p> <p>The heartwarming moment was captured by wedding photographer Joshua Hugget, who was taking photos at the picturesque wedding in South Australia. </p> <p>The video shows the two grandmothers arm-in-arm, dropping flower petals down the aisle in lieu of the standard young flower girls. </p> <p>The bride, Michaela Treloar, shared with the <em><a href="https://www.abc.net.au/news/2024-03-03/grandmothers-who-were-flower-girls-become-viral-sensation/103519006?sf271999625=1&fbclid=IwAR21H0d9_RfQkyBfP6SuyI1L_3KN8a4CdTXqqmx8tEfN8SyIp3FXY_ryqbg_aem_AZyZ59VDrmi0hZ-kcRd9Yncw5hZywZzo313-pUSnNYZJ-K_2Z4fXcOVlFcvX0Gn-E40">ABC</a></em> how she and her partner both “wanted to include our grandmothers into our wedding somehow”, which resulted in the adorable moment.</p> <blockquote class="instagram-media" style="background: #FFF; border: 0; border-radius: 3px; box-shadow: 0 0 1px 0 rgba(0,0,0,0.5),0 1px 10px 0 rgba(0,0,0,0.15); margin: 1px; max-width: 540px; min-width: 326px; padding: 0; width: calc(100% - 2px);" data-instgrm-permalink="https://www.instagram.com/reel/C3hCIP9PgsG/?utm_source=ig_embed&utm_campaign=loading" data-instgrm-version="14"> <div style="padding: 16px;"> <div style="display: flex; flex-direction: row; align-items: center;"> <div style="background-color: #f4f4f4; border-radius: 50%; flex-grow: 0; height: 40px; margin-right: 14px; width: 40px;"> </div> <div style="display: flex; flex-direction: column; flex-grow: 1; justify-content: center;"> <div style="background-color: #f4f4f4; border-radius: 4px; flex-grow: 0; height: 14px; margin-bottom: 6px; width: 100px;"> </div> <div style="background-color: #f4f4f4; border-radius: 4px; flex-grow: 0; height: 14px; width: 60px;"> </div> </div> </div> <div style="padding: 19% 0;"> </div> <div style="display: block; height: 50px; margin: 0 auto 12px; width: 50px;"> </div> <div style="padding-top: 8px;"> <div style="color: #3897f0; font-family: Arial,sans-serif; font-size: 14px; font-style: normal; font-weight: 550; line-height: 18px;">View this post on Instagram</div> </div> <div style="padding: 12.5% 0;"> </div> <div style="display: flex; flex-direction: row; margin-bottom: 14px; align-items: center;"> <div> <div style="background-color: #f4f4f4; border-radius: 50%; height: 12.5px; width: 12.5px; transform: translateX(0px) translateY(7px);"> </div> <div style="background-color: #f4f4f4; height: 12.5px; transform: rotate(-45deg) translateX(3px) translateY(1px); width: 12.5px; flex-grow: 0; margin-right: 14px; margin-left: 2px;"> </div> <div style="background-color: #f4f4f4; border-radius: 50%; height: 12.5px; width: 12.5px; transform: translateX(9px) translateY(-18px);"> </div> </div> <div style="margin-left: 8px;"> <div style="background-color: #f4f4f4; border-radius: 50%; flex-grow: 0; height: 20px; width: 20px;"> </div> <div style="width: 0; height: 0; border-top: 2px solid transparent; border-left: 6px solid #f4f4f4; border-bottom: 2px solid transparent; transform: translateX(16px) translateY(-4px) rotate(30deg);"> </div> </div> <div style="margin-left: auto;"> <div style="width: 0px; border-top: 8px solid #F4F4F4; border-right: 8px solid transparent; transform: translateY(16px);"> </div> <div style="background-color: #f4f4f4; flex-grow: 0; height: 12px; width: 16px; transform: translateY(-4px);"> </div> <div style="width: 0; height: 0; border-top: 8px solid #F4F4F4; border-left: 8px solid transparent; transform: translateY(-4px) translateX(8px);"> </div> </div> </div> <div style="display: flex; flex-direction: column; flex-grow: 1; justify-content: center; margin-bottom: 24px;"> <div style="background-color: #f4f4f4; border-radius: 4px; flex-grow: 0; height: 14px; margin-bottom: 6px; width: 224px;"> </div> <div style="background-color: #f4f4f4; border-radius: 4px; flex-grow: 0; height: 14px; width: 144px;"> </div> </div> <p style="color: #c9c8cd; font-family: Arial,sans-serif; font-size: 14px; line-height: 17px; margin-bottom: 0; margin-top: 8px; overflow: hidden; padding: 8px 0 7px; text-align: center; text-overflow: ellipsis; white-space: nowrap;"><a style="color: #c9c8cd; font-family: Arial,sans-serif; font-size: 14px; font-style: normal; font-weight: normal; line-height: 17px; text-decoration: none;" href="https://www.instagram.com/reel/C3hCIP9PgsG/?utm_source=ig_embed&utm_campaign=loading" target="_blank" rel="noopener">A post shared by Joshua Huggett Media (@joshuahuggettmedia)</a></p> </div> </blockquote> <p>“They took it on with pride, smashed it, and now they’ve gone viral,” exclaimed Treloar.</p> <p>“It was really cute … each nonna was helping each other get to the end of the aisle, chatting all the way.”</p> <p>The photographer who captured the moment shared that he believes something about the video is relatable to everyone in some way, and that is the secret to its success.</p> <p>“It hits that heart string straight away … it’s the perfect concoction of people saying they want to do that with their grandma, teamed with people saying they wish they could do that with their grandma now that they’d passed,” Joshua shared.</p> <p>The flower grannies shining moment has been viewed millions of times, with many leaving comments praising the married couple for including their grandmothers in their big day. </p> <p>“I have goosebumps head to toe! The smiles on the grannies’ faces …. Priceless!!!!!!!” One user commented. </p> <p>“Hope this trend catches on, it’s truly beautiful!”</p> <p><em>Image credits: Instagram - Joshua Hugget Media</em></p>

Family & Pets

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Young and the Restless star’s baby girl hospitalised

<p>In a deeply emotional and concerning post, popular American soap actor Jordi Vilasuso has reached out to the public, seeking prayers for his baby daughter Lucy, who is currently battling respiratory syncytial virus (RSV) and a partially collapsed lung.</p> <p>The <em>Young and the Restless</em> actor, along with his wife Kaitlin, has been candid about their family's struggles, and their latest plea for support has left fans and followers deeply moved.</p> <p>The distressing update was shared by Jordi on his social media platforms, as he revealed the harrowing journey Lucy has been through. The post detailed the rapid deterioration of Lucy's health, from the initial diagnosis of RSV to her subsequent hospitalisation due to difficulty breathing. The situation took an unexpected turn for the worse, with Lucy being moved to the Neonatal Intensive Care Unit (NICU) due to a partially collapsed right lung.</p> <blockquote class="instagram-media" style="background: #FFF; border: 0; border-radius: 3px; box-shadow: 0 0 1px 0 rgba(0,0,0,0.5),0 1px 10px 0 rgba(0,0,0,0.15); margin: 1px; max-width: 540px; min-width: 326px; padding: 0; width: calc(100% - 2px);" data-instgrm-captioned="" data-instgrm-permalink="https://www.instagram.com/p/C2iurRXvfQ4/?utm_source=ig_embed&utm_campaign=loading" data-instgrm-version="14"> <div style="padding: 16px;"> <div style="display: flex; flex-direction: row; align-items: center;"> <div style="background-color: #f4f4f4; border-radius: 50%; flex-grow: 0; height: 40px; margin-right: 14px; width: 40px;"> </div> <div style="display: flex; flex-direction: column; flex-grow: 1; justify-content: center;"> <div style="background-color: #f4f4f4; border-radius: 4px; flex-grow: 0; height: 14px; margin-bottom: 6px; width: 100px;"> </div> <div style="background-color: #f4f4f4; border-radius: 4px; flex-grow: 0; height: 14px; width: 60px;"> </div> </div> </div> <div style="padding: 19% 0;"> </div> <div style="display: block; height: 50px; margin: 0 auto 12px; width: 50px;"> </div> <div style="padding-top: 8px;"> <div style="color: #3897f0; font-family: Arial,sans-serif; font-size: 14px; font-style: normal; font-weight: 550; line-height: 18px;">View this post on Instagram</div> </div> <div style="padding: 12.5% 0;"> </div> <div style="display: flex; flex-direction: row; margin-bottom: 14px; align-items: center;"> <div> <div style="background-color: #f4f4f4; border-radius: 50%; height: 12.5px; width: 12.5px; transform: translateX(0px) translateY(7px);"> </div> <div style="background-color: #f4f4f4; height: 12.5px; transform: rotate(-45deg) translateX(3px) translateY(1px); width: 12.5px; flex-grow: 0; margin-right: 14px; margin-left: 2px;"> </div> <div style="background-color: #f4f4f4; border-radius: 50%; height: 12.5px; width: 12.5px; transform: translateX(9px) translateY(-18px);"> </div> </div> <div style="margin-left: 8px;"> <div style="background-color: #f4f4f4; border-radius: 50%; flex-grow: 0; height: 20px; width: 20px;"> </div> <div style="width: 0; height: 0; border-top: 2px solid transparent; border-left: 6px solid #f4f4f4; border-bottom: 2px solid transparent; transform: translateX(16px) translateY(-4px) rotate(30deg);"> </div> </div> <div style="margin-left: auto;"> <div style="width: 0px; border-top: 8px solid #F4F4F4; border-right: 8px solid transparent; transform: translateY(16px);"> </div> <div style="background-color: #f4f4f4; flex-grow: 0; height: 12px; width: 16px; transform: translateY(-4px);"> </div> <div style="width: 0; height: 0; border-top: 8px solid #F4F4F4; border-left: 8px solid transparent; transform: translateY(-4px) translateX(8px);"> </div> </div> </div> <div style="display: flex; flex-direction: column; flex-grow: 1; justify-content: center; margin-bottom: 24px;"> <div style="background-color: #f4f4f4; border-radius: 4px; flex-grow: 0; height: 14px; margin-bottom: 6px; width: 224px;"> </div> <div style="background-color: #f4f4f4; border-radius: 4px; flex-grow: 0; height: 14px; width: 144px;"> </div> </div> <p style="color: #c9c8cd; font-family: Arial,sans-serif; font-size: 14px; line-height: 17px; margin-bottom: 0; margin-top: 8px; overflow: hidden; padding: 8px 0 7px; text-align: center; text-overflow: ellipsis; white-space: nowrap;"><a style="color: #c9c8cd; font-family: Arial,sans-serif; font-size: 14px; font-style: normal; font-weight: normal; line-height: 17px; text-decoration: none;" href="https://www.instagram.com/p/C2iurRXvfQ4/?utm_source=ig_embed&utm_campaign=loading" target="_blank" rel="noopener">A post shared by KAITLIN VILASUSO (@kaitlinvilasuso)</a></p> </div> </blockquote> <p>Jordi's heartfelt words reflected the gravity of the situation: "Last night, things unexpectedly took a turn for the worse and she was moved to NICU w/ what the doctors described as a partially collapsed right lung. I am still struggling to believe this as I type."</p> <p>The accompanying photos paint a poignant picture of Lucy's tiny form surrounded by medical equipment in the NICU, evoking empathy and concern from those who have followed the Vilasuso family's journey.</p> <p>Kaitlin, also sharing updates on her Instagram Story, posted a video of her sister, actor Bailee Madison, spending time with Lucy while the couple's older children, Riley and Everly, received attention. In the video, Kaitlin expressed gratitude for the support, captioning it: "My angel of a sister loving on Lucy so we could love on our big girls for a few."</p> <blockquote class="instagram-media" style="background: #FFF; border: 0; border-radius: 3px; box-shadow: 0 0 1px 0 rgba(0,0,0,0.5),0 1px 10px 0 rgba(0,0,0,0.15); margin: 1px; max-width: 540px; min-width: 326px; padding: 0; width: calc(100% - 2px);" data-instgrm-captioned="" data-instgrm-permalink="https://www.instagram.com/p/C2sn8nLS2-B/?utm_source=ig_embed&utm_campaign=loading" data-instgrm-version="14"> <div style="padding: 16px;"> <div style="display: flex; flex-direction: row; align-items: center;"> <div style="background-color: #f4f4f4; border-radius: 50%; flex-grow: 0; height: 40px; margin-right: 14px; width: 40px;"> </div> <div style="display: flex; flex-direction: column; flex-grow: 1; justify-content: center;"> <div style="background-color: #f4f4f4; border-radius: 4px; flex-grow: 0; height: 14px; margin-bottom: 6px; width: 100px;"> </div> <div style="background-color: #f4f4f4; border-radius: 4px; flex-grow: 0; height: 14px; width: 60px;"> </div> </div> </div> <div style="padding: 19% 0;"> </div> <div style="display: block; height: 50px; margin: 0 auto 12px; width: 50px;"> </div> <div style="padding-top: 8px;"> <div style="color: #3897f0; font-family: Arial,sans-serif; font-size: 14px; font-style: normal; font-weight: 550; line-height: 18px;">View this post on Instagram</div> </div> <div style="padding: 12.5% 0;"> </div> <div style="display: flex; flex-direction: row; margin-bottom: 14px; align-items: center;"> <div> <div style="background-color: #f4f4f4; border-radius: 50%; height: 12.5px; width: 12.5px; transform: translateX(0px) translateY(7px);"> </div> <div style="background-color: #f4f4f4; height: 12.5px; transform: rotate(-45deg) translateX(3px) translateY(1px); width: 12.5px; flex-grow: 0; margin-right: 14px; margin-left: 2px;"> </div> <div style="background-color: #f4f4f4; border-radius: 50%; height: 12.5px; width: 12.5px; transform: translateX(9px) translateY(-18px);"> </div> </div> <div style="margin-left: 8px;"> <div style="background-color: #f4f4f4; border-radius: 50%; flex-grow: 0; height: 20px; width: 20px;"> </div> <div style="width: 0; height: 0; border-top: 2px solid transparent; border-left: 6px solid #f4f4f4; border-bottom: 2px solid transparent; transform: translateX(16px) translateY(-4px) rotate(30deg);"> </div> </div> <div style="margin-left: auto;"> <div style="width: 0px; border-top: 8px solid #F4F4F4; border-right: 8px solid transparent; transform: translateY(16px);"> </div> <div style="background-color: #f4f4f4; flex-grow: 0; height: 12px; width: 16px; transform: translateY(-4px);"> </div> <div style="width: 0; height: 0; border-top: 8px solid #F4F4F4; border-left: 8px solid transparent; transform: translateY(-4px) translateX(8px);"> </div> </div> </div> <div style="display: flex; flex-direction: column; flex-grow: 1; justify-content: center; margin-bottom: 24px;"> <div style="background-color: #f4f4f4; border-radius: 4px; flex-grow: 0; height: 14px; margin-bottom: 6px; width: 224px;"> </div> <div style="background-color: #f4f4f4; border-radius: 4px; flex-grow: 0; height: 14px; width: 144px;"> </div> </div> <p style="color: #c9c8cd; font-family: Arial,sans-serif; font-size: 14px; line-height: 17px; margin-bottom: 0; margin-top: 8px; overflow: hidden; padding: 8px 0 7px; text-align: center; text-overflow: ellipsis; white-space: nowrap;"><a style="color: #c9c8cd; font-family: Arial,sans-serif; font-size: 14px; font-style: normal; font-weight: normal; line-height: 17px; text-decoration: none;" href="https://www.instagram.com/p/C2sn8nLS2-B/?utm_source=ig_embed&utm_campaign=loading" target="_blank" rel="noopener">A post shared by KAITLIN VILASUSO (@kaitlinvilasuso)</a></p> </div> </blockquote> <p>As the Vilasuso family faces this challenging time, the outpouring of love, prayers and healing energy from fans, friends and fellow actors has been significant. Bailee Madison, taking to her own Instagram Story, thanked everyone for their support, saying, "love and prayers and healing energy coming" for her niece.</p> <p>This heartbreaking situation comes after the couple's announcement of Kaitlin's pregnancy in September 2023. The journey to this point has been marked by adversity, as the couple had previously experienced the loss of two children during pregnancy. Kaitlin underwent a surgical procedure called a cerclage, a delicate intervention aimed at preventing further losses by temporarily sewing the cervix closed with stitches.</p> <p>The Vilasuso family's openness about their highs and lows has endeared them to many, and as Lucy fights for her health in the NICU, the couple is once again relying on the support of their community to pray for a miraculous healing for their precious daughter.</p> <p><em>Images: Instagram</em></p>

Caring

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"My little girl!": Cindy Crawford gushes over lookalike daughter

<p>Cindy Crawford is every bit the doting mum as she posted an adorable video montage to celebrate her daughter's 22nd birthday. </p> <p>The former model took to Instagram to share clips of her daughter Kaia Gerber throughout her childhood. </p> <p>"Such a joy watching you bloom into an inspiring young woman,"  she captioned the video. </p> <p>"Love spending time with you at this new stage in our lives — woman to woman — but you'll also always be my little girl!"</p> <p>The young model replied: "This made me cry! I feel so lucky to have been raised by my best friend. I love you mama ♥️"</p> <blockquote class="instagram-media" style="background: #FFF; border: 0; border-radius: 3px; box-shadow: 0 0 1px 0 rgba(0,0,0,0.5),0 1px 10px 0 rgba(0,0,0,0.15); margin: 1px; max-width: 540px; min-width: 326px; padding: 0; width: calc(100% - 2px);" data-instgrm-captioned="" data-instgrm-permalink="https://www.instagram.com/reel/CwvF7iIuwEB/?utm_source=ig_embed&utm_campaign=loading" data-instgrm-version="14"> <div style="padding: 16px;"> <div style="display: flex; flex-direction: row; align-items: center;"> <div style="background-color: #f4f4f4; border-radius: 50%; flex-grow: 0; height: 40px; margin-right: 14px; width: 40px;"> </div> <div style="display: flex; flex-direction: column; flex-grow: 1; justify-content: center;"> <div style="background-color: #f4f4f4; border-radius: 4px; flex-grow: 0; height: 14px; margin-bottom: 6px; width: 100px;"> </div> <div style="background-color: #f4f4f4; border-radius: 4px; flex-grow: 0; height: 14px; width: 60px;"> </div> </div> </div> <div style="padding: 19% 0;"> </div> <div style="display: block; height: 50px; margin: 0 auto 12px; width: 50px;"> </div> <div style="padding-top: 8px;"> <div style="color: #3897f0; font-family: Arial,sans-serif; font-size: 14px; font-style: normal; font-weight: 550; line-height: 18px;">View this post on Instagram</div> </div> <div style="padding: 12.5% 0;"> </div> <div style="display: flex; flex-direction: row; margin-bottom: 14px; align-items: center;"> <div> <div style="background-color: #f4f4f4; border-radius: 50%; height: 12.5px; width: 12.5px; transform: translateX(0px) translateY(7px);"> </div> <div style="background-color: #f4f4f4; height: 12.5px; transform: rotate(-45deg) translateX(3px) translateY(1px); width: 12.5px; flex-grow: 0; margin-right: 14px; margin-left: 2px;"> </div> <div style="background-color: #f4f4f4; border-radius: 50%; height: 12.5px; width: 12.5px; transform: translateX(9px) translateY(-18px);"> </div> </div> <div style="margin-left: 8px;"> <div style="background-color: #f4f4f4; border-radius: 50%; flex-grow: 0; height: 20px; width: 20px;"> </div> <div style="width: 0; height: 0; border-top: 2px solid transparent; border-left: 6px solid #f4f4f4; border-bottom: 2px solid transparent; transform: translateX(16px) translateY(-4px) rotate(30deg);"> </div> </div> <div style="margin-left: auto;"> <div style="width: 0px; border-top: 8px solid #F4F4F4; border-right: 8px solid transparent; transform: translateY(16px);"> </div> <div style="background-color: #f4f4f4; flex-grow: 0; height: 12px; width: 16px; transform: translateY(-4px);"> </div> <div style="width: 0; height: 0; border-top: 8px solid #F4F4F4; border-left: 8px solid transparent; transform: translateY(-4px) translateX(8px);"> </div> </div> </div> <div style="display: flex; flex-direction: column; flex-grow: 1; justify-content: center; margin-bottom: 24px;"> <div style="background-color: #f4f4f4; border-radius: 4px; flex-grow: 0; height: 14px; margin-bottom: 6px; width: 224px;"> </div> <div style="background-color: #f4f4f4; border-radius: 4px; flex-grow: 0; height: 14px; width: 144px;"> </div> </div> <p style="color: #c9c8cd; font-family: Arial,sans-serif; font-size: 14px; line-height: 17px; margin-bottom: 0; margin-top: 8px; overflow: hidden; padding: 8px 0 7px; text-align: center; text-overflow: ellipsis; white-space: nowrap;"><a style="color: #c9c8cd; font-family: Arial,sans-serif; font-size: 14px; font-style: normal; font-weight: normal; line-height: 17px; text-decoration: none;" href="https://www.instagram.com/reel/CwvF7iIuwEB/?utm_source=ig_embed&utm_campaign=loading" target="_blank" rel="noopener">A post shared by Cindy Crawford (@cindycrawford)</a></p> </div> </blockquote> <p>Gerber was born in 2001 and is the daughter of Crawford and her businessman husband Rande Gerber.</p> <p>She first started her modelling career at only 10-years-old, in a campaign for Versace, and has since followed in her mum's footsteps. </p> <p>Her most recent photoshoot for Italian fashion magazine, <em>D</em>, showcases just how identical she looks to mum as she posed in a few glamorous dresses made by luxury fashion brand, Celine. </p> <p>Gerber looked stunning in the black-and-white photos and mum Crawford couldn't hide her pride. </p> <p>"Love these! And you!" she commented with a kissing face emoji. </p> <blockquote class="instagram-media" style="background: #FFF; border: 0; border-radius: 3px; box-shadow: 0 0 1px 0 rgba(0,0,0,0.5),0 1px 10px 0 rgba(0,0,0,0.15); margin: 1px; max-width: 540px; min-width: 326px; padding: 0; width: calc(100% - 2px);" data-instgrm-captioned="" data-instgrm-permalink="https://www.instagram.com/p/CwyaeYPRqye/?utm_source=ig_embed&utm_campaign=loading" data-instgrm-version="14"> <div style="padding: 16px;"> <div style="display: flex; flex-direction: row; align-items: center;"> <div style="background-color: #f4f4f4; border-radius: 50%; flex-grow: 0; height: 40px; margin-right: 14px; width: 40px;"> </div> <div style="display: flex; flex-direction: column; flex-grow: 1; justify-content: center;"> <div style="background-color: #f4f4f4; border-radius: 4px; flex-grow: 0; height: 14px; margin-bottom: 6px; width: 100px;"> </div> <div style="background-color: #f4f4f4; border-radius: 4px; flex-grow: 0; height: 14px; width: 60px;"> </div> </div> </div> <div style="padding: 19% 0;"> </div> <div style="display: block; height: 50px; margin: 0 auto 12px; width: 50px;"> </div> <div style="padding-top: 8px;"> <div style="color: #3897f0; font-family: Arial,sans-serif; font-size: 14px; font-style: normal; font-weight: 550; line-height: 18px;">View this post on Instagram</div> </div> <div style="padding: 12.5% 0;"> </div> <div style="display: flex; flex-direction: row; margin-bottom: 14px; align-items: center;"> <div> <div style="background-color: #f4f4f4; border-radius: 50%; height: 12.5px; width: 12.5px; transform: translateX(0px) translateY(7px);"> </div> <div style="background-color: #f4f4f4; height: 12.5px; transform: rotate(-45deg) translateX(3px) translateY(1px); width: 12.5px; flex-grow: 0; margin-right: 14px; margin-left: 2px;"> </div> <div style="background-color: #f4f4f4; border-radius: 50%; height: 12.5px; width: 12.5px; transform: translateX(9px) translateY(-18px);"> </div> </div> <div style="margin-left: 8px;"> <div style="background-color: #f4f4f4; border-radius: 50%; flex-grow: 0; height: 20px; width: 20px;"> </div> <div style="width: 0; height: 0; border-top: 2px solid transparent; border-left: 6px solid #f4f4f4; border-bottom: 2px solid transparent; transform: translateX(16px) translateY(-4px) rotate(30deg);"> </div> </div> <div style="margin-left: auto;"> <div style="width: 0px; border-top: 8px solid #F4F4F4; border-right: 8px solid transparent; transform: translateY(16px);"> </div> <div style="background-color: #f4f4f4; flex-grow: 0; height: 12px; width: 16px; transform: translateY(-4px);"> </div> <div style="width: 0; height: 0; border-top: 8px solid #F4F4F4; border-left: 8px solid transparent; transform: translateY(-4px) translateX(8px);"> </div> </div> </div> <div style="display: flex; flex-direction: column; flex-grow: 1; justify-content: center; margin-bottom: 24px;"> <div style="background-color: #f4f4f4; border-radius: 4px; flex-grow: 0; height: 14px; margin-bottom: 6px; width: 224px;"> </div> <div style="background-color: #f4f4f4; border-radius: 4px; flex-grow: 0; height: 14px; width: 144px;"> </div> </div> <p style="color: #c9c8cd; font-family: Arial,sans-serif; font-size: 14px; line-height: 17px; margin-bottom: 0; margin-top: 8px; overflow: hidden; padding: 8px 0 7px; text-align: center; text-overflow: ellipsis; white-space: nowrap;"><a style="color: #c9c8cd; font-family: Arial,sans-serif; font-size: 14px; font-style: normal; font-weight: normal; line-height: 17px; text-decoration: none;" href="https://www.instagram.com/p/CwyaeYPRqye/?utm_source=ig_embed&utm_campaign=loading" target="_blank" rel="noopener">A post shared by Kaia (@kaiagerber)</a></p> </div> </blockquote> <p>Fellow celebrity friends and fans took to the comments to praise the young model's gorgeous looks. </p> <p>"Wow!" wrote fellow model Hailey Bieber. </p> <p>"Omg," commented model and<em> Daisy Jones & The Six </em>actress Camila Morrone. </p> <p>"So so beautiful," wrote one fan. </p> <p>"This is my favourite shoot of you. ❤️" commented another. </p> <p><em>Images: Instagram</em></p>

Family & Pets

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#GirlMaths: a seemingly innocent and fun way to justify expenses that can have serious financial consequences

<p><em><a href="https://theconversation.com/profiles/janneke-blijlevens-150258">Janneke Blijlevens</a>, <a href="https://theconversation.com/institutions/rmit-university-1063">RMIT University</a>; <a href="https://theconversation.com/profiles/angel-zhong-1204643">Angel Zhong</a>, <a href="https://theconversation.com/institutions/rmit-university-1063">RMIT University</a>, and <a href="https://theconversation.com/profiles/lauren-gurrieri-5402">Lauren Gurrieri</a>, <a href="https://theconversation.com/institutions/rmit-university-1063">RMIT University</a></em></p> <p>These shoes are perfect, made for me! I have to get them! But really, I should be paying off my car loan instead. I can’t justify this purchase. Or can I …?</p> <p>We all know this feeling, this tension between what you really want to do and what you really should, or shouldn’t, do. What you are experiencing is <a href="https://www.britannica.com/biography/Leon-Festinger/Cognitive-dissonance">cognitive dissonance</a>.</p> <p>It’s a psychological discomfort we feel when our behaviours and our values or beliefs do not match. Not to worry, we can make that discomfort simply disappear with a good dose of #GirlMaths!</p> <h2>So what is #GirlMaths?</h2> <p>GirlMaths recently became a viral phenomenon on TikTok after New Zealand FVHZM radio hosts Fletch, Vaughan and Hayley used #GirlMaths to justify one host’s mother’s expensive dress purchase as basically free because the dress was going to be worn at least four times.</p> <p><iframe id="tc-infographic-904" class="tc-infographic" style="border: none;" src="https://cdn.theconversation.com/infographics/904/f0b5e215a804bb450e609c397b96c7fcbf46172f/site/index.html" width="100%" height="400px" frameborder="0"></iframe></p> <p>Since then, influencers have added to the #GirlMaths trend with gems such as “If I buy it for $100, wear it, and then resell it for $80 then I basically wore it for free”, “If I pay with cash, it means it’s free”, and “If I just returned something, then purchase something new for the same amount of money, then it’s free”.</p> <p>The reason #GirlMaths resonates so well with everyone and allows it to go viral is that we are very familiar with this type of thinking. The mental gymnastics of #GirlMaths needed to justify cost-per-wear or cash-is-free is a perfect display of behavioural biases and heuristics, such as confirmation bias and denomination bias, being applied to everyday consumption decisions.</p> <h2>The psychology of decision-making</h2> <p>Behavioural biases and heuristics are shortcuts in our thinking that help us make decisions quicker and easier, and are great for reducing the cognitive dissonance we sometimes experience.</p> <p>Our brain has a lot of decisions to make in a day and simply doesn’t have the power to scrutinise every little detail of every <a href="https://theconversation.com/what-shall-we-have-for-dinner-choice-overload-is-a-real-problem-but-these-tips-will-make-your-life-easier-193317">decision</a>. These shortcuts in our thinking may facilitate the decision making process, but they don’t always mean we make the most optimal decisions.</p> <p>Confirmation bias is a bias where you justify your decisions by considering only the evidence that supports what you want and ignore the evidence that would mean you’d have to make a different decision. Cost-per-wear does sound quite financially savvy. It is just like bulk-buying pantry essentials, right?</p> <p>The issue is you are ignoring the facts such as: 1) your disposable income does not match this expense in light of your utility bills, 2) you could rewear a cheaper dress all the same, and 3) by spending money on a fancy dress, you lose the opportunity to spend the money on other better investments for wealth accumulation, or to pay off your car loan.</p> <h2>The financial and social costs</h2> <p>But it’s all a bit of innocent fun, right? Surely people won’t take #GirlMaths that seriously? We beg to differ.</p> <p>First, the term is unnecessarily gendered. Gendered language operates to reinforce societal expectations with a particular gender and can promote stereotypes, biases and binary categories.</p> <p>In this case, the term “girl maths” reinforces problematic stereotypes that equate women with consumption, frivolity and extravagant spending. When stereotypes are reinforced within our own social circles, we are more likely to <a href="https://journals.sagepub.com/doi/abs/10.1177/0146167299025007004?casa_token=dOhnQVtFwPsAAAAA:XSBdix5AB6bDfGjNgfbX9OIjstw4KE071GP0l60mAxvHJMaEwkyPERqHXf3z9PhctWJUl6h7TgTHg_U">internalise these as part of our identity</a>.</p> <p>By representing women in a less favourable way, the term operates to both demean and discriminate on a gendered basis. This is heightened by the use of “girl” as opposed to “woman”, which implies someone is childlike or lacking in knowledge or experience. It also begs the question what “boy maths” - set up as something opposing and different - might connote.</p> <p>Second, the #GirlMaths trend reminds us of the power of “<a href="https://theconversation.com/fintok-and-finfluencers-are-on-the-rise-3-tips-to-assess-if-their-advice-has-value-161406">finfluencers</a>” – social media content creators amassing huge online followings by sharing advice on anything from budgeting to buying a house, to investing.</p> <p>These online gurus appeal to Gen Z and millennials, simplifying complex financial concepts into digestible nuggets, much like #GirlMaths simplifies purchases based on cost-per-wear or cash-as-free.</p> <p>Just as regulators such as <a href="https://moneysmart.gov.au/other-ways-to-borrow/buy-now-pay-later-services">ASIC</a> repeatedly warn us of the dangers of buy-now-pay-later services, we must caution the #GirlMaths trend as a dangerous cocktail for young women who are susceptible to the “advice” of finfluencers.</p> <p>The trend resembles BNPL by breaking down expenses into smaller, more palatable portions, making purchases seem justifiable and affordable at the moment.</p> <p>Denomination bias describes this tendency to spend more money when it is denominated in small amounts rather than large amounts. We find it much easier to spend $50 four times than $200 all at once.</p> <p>However, the convenience of these shortcuts in our thinking can obscure the hidden financial risks. You may overlook the bigger picture of your financial health, and spend more than what you can afford. That’s why a large number of BNPL users find themselves ending up in a <a href="https://www.choice.com.au/money/credit-cards-and-loans/personal-loans/articles/bnpl-submission-to-treasury">modern debt trap</a>.</p> <h2>The perils of #GirlMaths</h2> <p>The danger of #GirlMaths to young women lies in the cocktail of feeling oddly familiar and reinforced in this biased thinking, the problematic stereotypes that shape identities, and the power of finfluencers, who wield increasing influence over the financial choices and decision-making of young women.</p> <p>While the term may initially come across as innocent fun, it’s crucial not to underestimate its potential harms. Instead, let’s champion the use of inclusive language in finance that doesn’t perpetuate gender biases.</p> <p>And if you’re a staunch supporter of #GirlMaths, we strongly urge you to take into account the possible adverse financial consequences of these quick-fix spending habits.<!-- Below is The Conversation's page counter tag. Please DO NOT REMOVE. --><img style="border: none !important; box-shadow: none !important; margin: 0 !important; max-height: 1px !important; max-width: 1px !important; min-height: 1px !important; min-width: 1px !important; opacity: 0 !important; outline: none !important; padding: 0 !important;" src="https://counter.theconversation.com/content/211903/count.gif?distributor=republish-lightbox-basic" alt="The Conversation" width="1" height="1" /><!-- End of code. If you don't see any code above, please get new code from the Advanced tab after you click the republish button. The page counter does not collect any personal data. More info: https://theconversation.com/republishing-guidelines --></p> <p><em><a href="https://theconversation.com/profiles/janneke-blijlevens-150258">Janneke Blijlevens</a>, Senior Lecturer in Marketing, <a href="https://theconversation.com/institutions/rmit-university-1063">RMIT University</a>; <a href="https://theconversation.com/profiles/angel-zhong-1204643">Angel Zhong</a>, Associate Professor of Finance, <a href="https://theconversation.com/institutions/rmit-university-1063">RMIT University</a>, and <a href="https://theconversation.com/profiles/lauren-gurrieri-5402">Lauren Gurrieri</a>, Associate Professor in Marketing, <a href="https://theconversation.com/institutions/rmit-university-1063">RMIT University</a></em></p> <p><em>Image credits: Getty Images</em></p> <p><em>This article is republished from <a href="https://theconversation.com">The Conversation</a> under a Creative Commons license. Read the <a href="https://theconversation.com/girlmaths-a-seemingly-innocent-and-fun-way-to-justify-expenses-that-can-have-serious-financial-consequences-211903">original article</a>.</em></p>

Money & Banking

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Censorship or sensible: is it bad to listen to Fat Bottomed Girls with your kids?

<p><em><a href="https://theconversation.com/profiles/liz-giuffre-105499">Liz Giuffre</a>, <a href="https://theconversation.com/institutions/university-of-technology-sydney-936">University of Technology Sydney</a></em></p> <p>International music press has reported this week that Queen’s song Fat Bottomed Girls <a href="https://www.billboard.com/music/music-news/queen-fat-bottomed-girls-greatest-hits-1235396348/">has not been included</a> in a greatest hits compilation aimed at children.</p> <p>While there was no formal justification given, presumably lyrics “fat bottomed” and “big fat fatty” were the problem, and even the very singable hook, “Oh, won’t you take me home tonight”.</p> <p>Predictably, The Daily Mail and similar outlets used it as an excuse to bemoan cancel culture, political correctness and the like, with the headline “<a href="https://www.dailymail.co.uk/tvshowbiz/article-12424449/We-woke-Classic-Queen-song-Fat-Bottomed-Girls-mysteriously-dropped-groups-new-Greatest-Hits-collection.html">We Will Woke You</a>” quickly out of the gate.</p> <p>Joke headlines aside, should children be exposed to music with questionable themes or lyrics?</p> <p>The answer is not a hard yes or no. My colleague Shelley Brunt and I studied a range of factors and practices relating to <a href="https://www.routledge.com/Popular-Music-and-Parenting/Brunt-Giuffre/p/book/9780367367138">Popular Music and Parenting</a>, and we found that more important than individual songs or concerts is the support children are given when they’re listening or participating.</p> <p>A parent or caregiver should always be part of a conversation and some sort of relationship when engaging with music. This can involve practical things like making sure developing ears aren’t exposed to too harsh a volume or that they know how to find a trusted adult at a concert. But this also extends to the basics of media and cultural literacy, like what images and stories are being presented in popular music, and how we want to consider those in our own lives.</p> <p>In the same way you’d hope someone would talk to a child to remind them that superheroes can’t actually fly (and subsequently if you’re dressed as a superhero for book week don’t go leaping off tall buildings!), popular music of all types needs to be contextualised.</p> <figure><iframe src="https://www.youtube.com/embed/VMnjF1O4eH0?wmode=transparent&amp;start=0" width="440" height="260" frameborder="0" allowfullscreen="allowfullscreen"></iframe></figure> <h2>Should we censor, or change, the way popular music is presented for kids?</h2> <p>There is certainly a long tradition of amending popular songs to make them child or family friendly. On television, this has happened as long as the medium has been around, with some lyrics and dance moves toned down to appease concerned parents and tastemakers about the potential evils of pop.</p> <p>Famously, <a href="https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=oim51kUg748">Elvis Presley serenaded a literal Hound Dog</a> rather than the metaphorical villain of his 1950s hit.</p> <p>In Australia, the local TV version of <a href="https://nostalgiacentral.com/music/music-on-film-and-tv/bandstand-australia/">Bandstand</a> from the 1970s featured local artists singing clean versions of international pop songs while <a href="https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=guembJBOOyI">wearing modest hems and neck lines</a>.</p> <p>This continued with actual children also re-performing pop music, from the Mickey Mouse Club versions of songs from the US to our own wonderful star factory that was <a href="https://theconversation.com/all-my-loving-young-talent-time-still-glows-50-years-since-first-airing-on-australian-tv-159533">Young Talent Time</a>. The tradition continues today with family-friendly, popular music-based programming like The Voice and The Masked Singer.</p> <figure><iframe src="https://www.youtube.com/embed/oim51kUg748?wmode=transparent&amp;start=0" width="440" height="260" frameborder="0" allowfullscreen="allowfullscreen"></iframe></figure> <p>In America, there is a huge industry for children’s versions of pop music via the Kidz Bop franchise. Its formula of child performers covering current hits has been wildly successful for over 20 years. Some perhaps obvious substitutions are made – the <a href="https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zkctByJbtNY">cover of Lizzo’s About Damn Time</a> is now “About That Time”, with the opening lyric changed to “Kidz Bop O’Clock” rather than “Bad Bitch O’Clock”.</p> <p>In some other Kidz Bop songs, though, <a href="https://pudding.cool/2020/04/kidz-bop/">references to violence and drugs have been left in</a>.</p> <p>Other longer-standing children’s franchises have also made amendments to pop lyrics, but arguably with a bit more creativity and fun. The Muppets’ cover of Bohemian Rhapsody, replacing the original murder with a rant from Animal, is divine.</p> <figure><iframe src="https://www.youtube.com/embed/tgbNymZ7vqY?wmode=transparent&amp;start=0" width="440" height="260" frameborder="0" allowfullscreen="allowfullscreen"></iframe></figure> <h2>Should music ever just be for kids?</h2> <p>Context is key when deciding what is for children or for adults. And hopefully we’re always listening (in some way) together.</p> <p>Caregivers should be able to make an informed decision about whether a particular song is appropriate for their child, however they consider that in terms of context. By the same token, the resurgence of <a href="https://www.theguardian.com/music/2022/apr/05/how-the-wiggles-took-over-the-world-and-got-the-cool-kids-on-side-too">millennial love</a> for The Wiggles has shown us no one should be considered “too old” for Hot Potato or Fruit Salad.</p> <figure><iframe src="https://www.youtube.com/embed/quHus3DwN4Q?wmode=transparent&amp;start=0" width="440" height="260" frameborder="0" allowfullscreen="allowfullscreen"></iframe></figure> <p>When considering potential harm for younger listeners, factors like <a href="https://kidsafeqld.com.au/risks-noise-exposure-baby/">volume and tone</a> can be more dangerous than whether or not there’s a questionable lyric. Let’s remember, too, lots of “nursery rhymes” aimed at children are also quite violent if you listen to their words closely.</p> <p>French writer Jacques José Attali <a href="https://www.google.com.au/books/edition/Noise/OHe7AAAAIAAJ?hl=en">famously argued</a> the relationship between music, noise and harm is politics and power – even your most beloved song can become just noise if played too loudly or somewhere where you shouldn’t be hearing it.</p> <p>As an academic, parent and fat-bottomed girl myself, my advice is to keep having conversations with the children in your life about what you and they are listening to. Just like reminding your little superhero to only pretend to fly rather than to actually jump – when we sing along to Queen, we remember that using a word like “fat” and even “girl” isn’t how everyone likes to be treated these days.<!-- Below is The Conversation's page counter tag. Please DO NOT REMOVE. --><img style="border: none !important; box-shadow: none !important; margin: 0 !important; max-height: 1px !important; max-width: 1px !important; min-height: 1px !important; min-width: 1px !important; opacity: 0 !important; outline: none !important; padding: 0 !important;" src="https://counter.theconversation.com/content/212093/count.gif?distributor=republish-lightbox-basic" alt="The Conversation" width="1" height="1" /><!-- End of code. If you don't see any code above, please get new code from the Advanced tab after you click the republish button. The page counter does not collect any personal data. More info: https://theconversation.com/republishing-guidelines --></p> <p><em><a href="https://theconversation.com/profiles/liz-giuffre-105499">Liz Giuffre</a>, Senior Lecturer in Communication, <a href="https://theconversation.com/institutions/university-of-technology-sydney-936">University of Technology Sydney</a></em></p> <p><em>Image credits: Getty Images</em></p> <p><em>This article is republished from <a href="https://theconversation.com">The Conversation</a> under a Creative Commons license. Read the <a href="https://theconversation.com/censorship-or-sensible-is-it-bad-to-listen-to-fat-bottomed-girls-with-your-kids-212093">original article</a>.</em></p>

Music

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Firefighter adopts baby girl found in drop-off baby box

<p dir="ltr">When a US firefighter answered an alarm from within his own station, he could never have predicted the outcome. </p> <p dir="ltr">The man - who has chosen to remain anonymous - was working an overnight shift at his Florida station, Ocala Fire Rescue Station 1, when he was woken around 2am on January 2 by the noise.</p> <p dir="ltr">He recognised it straightaway as the alarm designed to notify first responders that a baby had been placed in their station’s Safe Haven Baby Box - a drop-off point specifically designed to allow someone to both safely and anonymously surrender a child.</p> <p dir="ltr">But as he confessed to <em>Today</em>, he “thought it was a false alarm” until he opened the box and discovered who was inside: a healthy baby girl swaddled in a pink blanket.</p> <p dir="ltr">“She had a little bottle with her and she was just chilling,” he said. “I picked her up and held her. We locked eyes, and that was it. I’ve loved her ever since that moment.”</p> <p dir="ltr">And he meant every word of it, with he and his wife going on to welcome her into their family, and to adopt her as their own. </p> <p dir="ltr">According to the firefighter, who is also a trained paramedic, he and his wife had been having trouble conceiving for more than a decade, and immediately he had started connecting the pieces. </p> <p dir="ltr">However, he hadn’t called his wife the second he found their future-daughter, hoping to avoid waking her, but that he’d known “she’d be on board” with his plan to take the baby to the hospital and ask about the likelihood of adopting her.</p> <p dir="ltr">He’d then gone through with that plan, writing a note to leave with the baby that “explained that my wife and I had been trying for 10 years to have a baby. I told them we’d completed all of our classes in the state of Florida and were registered to adopt.</p> <p dir="ltr">"All we needed was a child."</p> <p dir="ltr">It was then that he got in touch with his wife, filling her in on what had transpired that evening, and requesting that she not get too excited, as he himself was afraid the note might have been separated from the baby, and that “she’d be gone.”</p> <p dir="ltr">The days to follow were stressful for the hopeful couple, but just two days later on January 4, their dreams came true, and baby Zoey went home with her forever family. </p> <p dir="ltr">Three months later, they adopted her. </p> <p dir="ltr">The firefighter revealed that it was difficult not to become emotional when sharing their stories, and that he believed a higher power had been “helping us out” with the way she’d come into their lives. </p> <p dir="ltr">And as for why they’d chosen to share their story, he said it was in the hope that it would give young Zoey’s biological mother “some closure”, as they just wanted her to know that Zoey was “taken care of and that she’s loved beyond words.”</p> <p dir="ltr"><em>Images: CBS News</em></p>

Family & Pets

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8 mind-boggling facts about your favourite flowers and plants

<p>We’ve found some fun, quirky and downright mind-boggling facts about our favourite flowers and plants.</p> <p>1. A sunflower is not just one flower. Each head is composed of hundreds of tiny flowers, called florets, held together on a single seed. This is the case for all plants in the sunflower family, including daises.</p> <p>2. Apples, pears, peaches, cherries, raspberries, strawberries and more are actually in the rose family, making them cousins to the long-stemmed flower of love.</p> <p>3. During the 1600s, tulips were so valuable in Holland that their bulbs were worth more than gold. No wonder the Netherlands is known for their tulips!</p> <p>4. Bamboo is the fasted-growing woody plant in the world. The current Guinness World Record title is held by a certain species of the 45 genera of bamboo, which have been found to grow at up to 91 cm per day or at a rate of 0.00003 km/h.</p> <p>5. Strawberries are the only fruit that bears its seeds on the outside. It has on average 200 seeds.</p> <p>6. The oldest known flower was discovered in 2002, in northeast China. The flower, named archaefructus sinensis, bloomed around 125 million years ago and resembles a water lily.</p> <p>7. The titan arum is the world’s largest flower. The circumference of the flower can be over three metres and a single leaf can grow to the size of a small tree. However, it smells horribly like rotten flesh, earning its nickname of corpse flower.</p> <p>8. You can change the colour of your hydrangeas by altering the pH level of the soil. Alkaline soil will create pinker blooms, while a more acidic soil will produce blue blooms.</p> <p><em>Image credit: Instagram</em></p> <p><strong>Related links:</strong></p> <p><span style="text-decoration: underline;"><em><strong><a href="../lifestyle/gardening/2015/05/gardening-and-soil-ph/">What you need to know about your soil’s pH levels</a></strong></em></span></p> <p><span style="text-decoration: underline;"><em><strong><a href="../lifestyle/gardening/2015/05/over60-community-gardens-part-4/">Take a look inside the beautiful gardens of the Over60 community</a></strong></em></span></p> <p><span style="text-decoration: underline;"><em><strong><a href="../lifestyle/gardening/2015/06/attracting-birds-to-the-garden/">Top tips for attracting birds to the garden</a></strong></em></span></p>

Home & Garden

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The Girl from Ipanema singer dies at age 83

<p dir="ltr">Brazilian bossa nova singer, Astrud Gilberto, known for her rendition of <em>The Girl from Ipanema</em>, has died aged 83.</p> <p dir="ltr">Her granddaughter, Sofia Gilberto, took to Instagram to announce the news.</p> <p dir="ltr">"I'm here to bring you the sad news that my grandmother became a star today, and is next to my grandfather João Gilberto," she wrote in the caption, which was originally written in Portuguese.</p> <p dir="ltr">"She was a pioneer and the best. At the age of 22, she gave voice to the English version of Girl from Ipanema and gained international fame."</p> <p dir="ltr">Astrud helped popularise bossa nova worldwide, after her version of <em>The Girl from Ipanema</em> sold over 5 million copies.</p> <p dir="ltr">New York-based guitarist, Paul Ricci who collaborated with Astrud, also confirmed the sad news on Facebook.</p> <p dir="ltr">"I just got word from her son Marcelo that we have lost Astrud Gilberto. He asked for this to be posted: She was an important part of ALL that is Brazilian music in the world and she changed many lives with her energy. RIP from 'the chief', as she called me,” he wrote.</p> <p dir="ltr">Fans have paid tribute to the star on social media.</p> <p dir="ltr">“She was the defining cool voice of Bossa Nova which remains intoxicating to this day no matter how often you have heard it and made us dream of Rio,” wrote one fan.</p> <p dir="ltr">“I feel like one part of my childhood suddenly disappeared. RIP Astrud. Much love to all your family,” commented another.</p> <p dir="ltr">“My condolences to the entire family,” wrote a third.</p> <p><em>Images: Getty</em></p>

Caring

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Reality TV star welcomes identical twin girls

<p>Reality TV star Dani Dyer has welcomed two baby girls with her partner, footballer Jarrod Bowen. </p> <p>The <em>Love Island UK</em> winner, who won the show in 2018 with her ex-partner Jack Fincham in 2018, shared the happy news on her Instagram on Thursday. </p> <p>Dani didn't reveal the identical twin girls' names, but confirmed the date of their birth, May 22nd, in the caption. </p> <p>Dani is already mum to Santiago, two, who she shares with with ex Sammy Kimmence.</p> <p>Her <em>Love Island UK</em> co-stars were quick to send their congratulations, with season one winner Cara De La Hoyde writing, "Congratulations Dan they are beautiful ❤️."</p> <p>"Congratulations to your beautiful family ❤️," Zara McDermott added, while season four winner Molly-Mae Hague added, "Congratulations beautiful 😭😭😭."</p> <p>Dani is the daughter of English actor and presenter Danny Dyer, who's well known for his role in British soap <em>EastEnders</em>.</p> <p>Dani shared the news of her pregnancy with a sweet announcement post, showing her son Santiago holding a letter board with the ultrasound pictures of her new babies. </p> <blockquote class="instagram-media" style="background: #FFF; border: 0; border-radius: 3px; box-shadow: 0 0 1px 0 rgba(0,0,0,0.5),0 1px 10px 0 rgba(0,0,0,0.15); margin: 1px; max-width: 540px; min-width: 326px; padding: 0; width: calc(100% - 2px);" data-instgrm-permalink="https://www.instagram.com/p/CnpWIihrD1x/?utm_source=ig_embed&amp;utm_campaign=loading" data-instgrm-version="14"> <div style="padding: 16px;"> <div style="display: flex; flex-direction: row; align-items: center;"> <div style="background-color: #f4f4f4; border-radius: 50%; flex-grow: 0; height: 40px; margin-right: 14px; width: 40px;"> </div> <div style="display: flex; flex-direction: column; flex-grow: 1; justify-content: center;"> <div style="background-color: #f4f4f4; border-radius: 4px; flex-grow: 0; height: 14px; margin-bottom: 6px; width: 100px;"> </div> <div style="background-color: #f4f4f4; border-radius: 4px; flex-grow: 0; height: 14px; width: 60px;"> </div> </div> </div> <div style="padding: 19% 0;"> </div> <div style="display: block; height: 50px; margin: 0 auto 12px; width: 50px;"> </div> <div style="padding-top: 8px;"> <div style="color: #3897f0; font-family: Arial,sans-serif; font-size: 14px; font-style: normal; font-weight: 550; line-height: 18px;">View this post on Instagram</div> </div> <div style="padding: 12.5% 0;"> </div> <div style="display: flex; flex-direction: row; margin-bottom: 14px; align-items: center;"> <div> <div style="background-color: #f4f4f4; border-radius: 50%; height: 12.5px; width: 12.5px; transform: translateX(0px) translateY(7px);"> </div> <div style="background-color: #f4f4f4; height: 12.5px; transform: rotate(-45deg) translateX(3px) translateY(1px); width: 12.5px; flex-grow: 0; margin-right: 14px; margin-left: 2px;"> </div> <div style="background-color: #f4f4f4; border-radius: 50%; height: 12.5px; width: 12.5px; transform: translateX(9px) translateY(-18px);"> </div> </div> <div style="margin-left: 8px;"> <div style="background-color: #f4f4f4; border-radius: 50%; flex-grow: 0; height: 20px; width: 20px;"> </div> <div style="width: 0; height: 0; border-top: 2px solid transparent; border-left: 6px solid #f4f4f4; border-bottom: 2px solid transparent; transform: translateX(16px) translateY(-4px) rotate(30deg);"> </div> </div> <div style="margin-left: auto;"> <div style="width: 0px; border-top: 8px solid #F4F4F4; border-right: 8px solid transparent; transform: translateY(16px);"> </div> <div style="background-color: #f4f4f4; flex-grow: 0; height: 12px; width: 16px; transform: translateY(-4px);"> </div> <div style="width: 0; height: 0; border-top: 8px solid #F4F4F4; border-left: 8px solid transparent; transform: translateY(-4px) translateX(8px);"> </div> </div> </div> <div style="display: flex; flex-direction: column; flex-grow: 1; justify-content: center; margin-bottom: 24px;"> <div style="background-color: #f4f4f4; border-radius: 4px; flex-grow: 0; height: 14px; margin-bottom: 6px; width: 224px;"> </div> <div style="background-color: #f4f4f4; border-radius: 4px; flex-grow: 0; height: 14px; width: 144px;"> </div> </div> <p style="color: #c9c8cd; font-family: Arial,sans-serif; font-size: 14px; line-height: 17px; margin-bottom: 0; margin-top: 8px; overflow: hidden; padding: 8px 0 7px; text-align: center; text-overflow: ellipsis; white-space: nowrap;"><a style="color: #c9c8cd; font-family: Arial,sans-serif; font-size: 14px; font-style: normal; font-weight: normal; line-height: 17px; text-decoration: none;" href="https://www.instagram.com/p/CnpWIihrD1x/?utm_source=ig_embed&amp;utm_campaign=loading" target="_blank" rel="noopener">A post shared by ♡ Dani Dyer ♡ (@danidyerxx)</a></p> </div> </blockquote> <p>"We have been keeping a little secret... Our little TWINS!" she wrote.</p> <p>"So excited to meet our babies and watch Santi be the best big brother.. The biggest surprise of our lives but feeling SO blessed.. our family is getting a lot bigger and we can’t wait."</p> <p>Just weeks after announcing the pregnancy, Dani confirmed the gender of their babies in another Instagram post. </p> <p>"A lot of you have been asking on the gender of our babies and we are so excited to share with you all that we are having identical twin girls. Half way our little darlings."</p> <p><em>Image credits: Instagram</em></p>

Family & Pets

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Leo DiCaprio's new film gets 9-minute standing ovation

<p>If a 9-minute standing ovation is anything to go by, then claims that Martin Scorsese’s new project <em>Killers of the Flower Moon</em> is the “film of the year” may just be on to something. </p> <p>The movie - which stars the likes of Hollywood legends Leonardo DiCaprio, Robert De Niro, and Lily Gladstone - received exactly that: 9 whole minutes of applause after its world premiere at the 2023 Cannes Film Festival.</p> <p>Its stars were all in attendance, from Leo who was last present with <em>Once Upon a Time … in Hollywood</em>, to 80-year-old Scorsese, who was returning to the festival for the first time since 1985, when he was there for <em>After Hours</em>.</p> <p>The near-three-and-a-half-hour film - which shares its name with the David Grann book it was adapted from - takes place in 1920s Oklahoma, and shares the story of a dark period in American history, depicting the serial murders of members of the Osage Nation.</p> <p>Prior to its screening, the film had already been dubbed by some as the festival’s “most anticipated film” - it even saw Apple CEO Tim Cook swing by, as the company is one of the film’s distributors.</p> <p>And as soon as it concluded, the applause broke out - with some suspecting that it may have continued on beyond the 9-minute mark, had Scorsese not been asked to address the crowd. </p> <blockquote class="twitter-tweet"> <p dir="ltr" lang="en">Leonardo DiCaprio and Lily Gladstone land a 9-minute standing ovation for ‘Killers of the Flower Moon’ — the biggest and loudest of <a href="https://twitter.com/hashtag/Cannes2023?src=hash&amp;ref_src=twsrc%5Etfw">#Cannes2023</a> so far. <a href="https://t.co/1Gxp4cED1T">pic.twitter.com/1Gxp4cED1T</a></p> <p>— Ramin Setoodeh (@RaminSetoodeh) <a href="https://twitter.com/RaminSetoodeh/status/1660019896393113602?ref_src=twsrc%5Etfw">May 20, 2023</a></p></blockquote> <p>“Thank you to the Osages,” Scorsese said upon reaching the mic. “Everyone connected with the picture. My old pals Bob and Leo, and Jesse and Lily. We shot this a couple of years ago in Oklahoma. </p> <p>“It’s taken it’s time to come around but Apple did so great by us. There was lots of grass. I’m a New Yorker. I was very surprised. This was an amazing experience. </p> <p>“We lived in that world with the Osage, we really did, and we really miss it.”</p> <p>As former Osage tribal leader Jim Gray said of the experience, “the dignity and care for the Osage perspective was genuine and honest throughout the process and the Osage responded with the kind of passion and enthusiasm that met this historic moment.</p> <p>“For those of us who were watching from the sidelines while our best and brightest among us auditioned, sewed, catered, painted, acted and advised the filmmakers, it’s going to be hard not to feel our presence in helping to tell.”</p> <p>Lily Gladstone - who plays an Osage woman betrayed by her husband in the movie - had more to add, telling<em> Variety</em> that “the work is better when you let the world inform the work. That was very refreshing how involved the production got with the [Osage Nation] community. As the community warmed up to our presence, the more the community got involved with the film. </p> <p>“It’s a different movie than the one [Scorsese] walked in to make almost entirely because of what the community had to say about how it was being made and what was being portrayed.”</p> <p>And alongside praise for the film came praise for the performances within it, with many convinced Gladstone is set for attention during awards season for her work, and one reviewer even going so far as to call this “Leonardo DiCaprio’s best performance yet”.</p> <p><em>Images: Getty </em></p>

Movies

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Young girl who penned heartfelt letter to King Charles is floored by response

<p>An 11-year-old girl from New South Wales has captured hearts with her touching words and well-wishes for King Charles III. </p> <p>Maeve Malone, who lives in Willoughby with her family, wrote a letter to the monarch in September 2022 to offer her condolences on the loss of Charles’ late mother, Queen Elizabeth, and to let him know that she believes he will be a “fantastic king”.</p> <p>Maeve’s letter, which she shared with Ben Fordham on his 2GB series, opened with a quick introduction, before she launched into the heart of her message, writing that she was “really sorry to hear about your mum. I am 10 and in Year 4, Mum and Dad let me stay up to watch Queen Elizabeth II’s funeral. </p> <p>“You were so brave on that sad day. I think you will be excellent at leading the commonwealth. I also believe you will be a fantastic king.” </p> <p>At the end of the page - one embellished with colourful images of purple flowers - Maeve shared another personal message for Charles, letting him know of their shared interest in botany when she said, “Mum told me you like gardening, me too! I hope the flowers in your new home are blossoming.”</p> <p>“I hope to visit London one day,” she concluded. “When I do, I will go past your home and think of you and your mum. </p> <p>“Best of luck with your new job.” </p> <p>After reading Maeve’s letter, radio host Fordham checked in with the young girl, asking her what had prompted her to put pen to paper and contact Charles in the first place. </p> <p>“I wrote it because I wanted him to know that I was sorry for Queen Elizabeth,” Maeve explained, “I really liked Queen Elizabeth, ‘cause she was a really good leader, and it was really sad for Charles to lose his mum.” </p> <p>When Fordham asked what Maeve had expected from her kind words, and whether or not she had anticipated a response, the 11 year old was quick to admit that she hadn’t expected one. </p> <p>But to her delight, she’d been wrong, with a letter arriving in the mail, addressed to her and signed by the monarch. </p> <p>“I got it out of the letter box, and when I got it … I started jumping with joy,” Maeve said. </p> <p>That letter - typed up with Charles’ signature at the bottom - read, “it was so very kind of you to send me such a wonderfully generous message following the death of my beloved mother. </p> <p>“Your most thoughtful words are enormously comforting, and I cannot tell you how deeply they are appreciated at this time of immense sorrow.” </p> <p>And while Maeve’s entire day might have been made with the kind reply, she still won’t be able to tune in for her new friend’s big day - he might have his coronation to attend, but Maeve is a busy girl, and has a party of her own to get to. </p> <p><em>Images: Ben Fordham Live / 2GB</em></p>

Family & Pets

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Girl, Interrupted interrogates how women are ‘mad’ when they refuse to conform – 30 years on, this memoir is still important

<p>Thirty years ago, American writer Susanna Kaysen published her memoir <a href="https://www.hachette.com.au/susanna-kaysen/girl-interrupted">Girl, Interrupted</a>. It tells the story of her two years inside McLean Hospital in Boston as a psychiatric patient.</p> <p>She was admitted, aged 18, in 1967. A few months earlier, she had taken 50 aspirin in a state of despair. Late in the book, she reveals she had a sexual relationship with her male English teacher at school.</p> <p>Kaysen was interviewed briefly by a doctor before she was admitted as a “voluntary” patient: a legal category used to indicate a person’s status in the institution. Despite what the term implies, “voluntary” doesn’t mean a patient can leave without the consent of their medical team, as Kaysen explains. People admitted as voluntary patients acknowledge their own need for treatment.</p> <p>During Kaysen’s stay, she was treated with an <a href="https://theconversation.com/story-of-antipsychotics-is-one-of-myth-and-misrepresentation-18306">antipsychotic</a> medication, chlorpromazine, and received psychotherapy. In her memoir, the stories of other young women confined with her at McLean convey sympathetic and recognisable experiences of the institutional world and its regime.</p> <p>Girl, Interrupted is one of the most famous memoirs of hospitalisation and mental illness. More <a href="https://www.euppublishing.com/doi/abs/10.3366/ircl.2019.0310?journalCode=ircl">recent interpretations</a> describe it as a narrative of “trauma”.</p> <h2>‘Mad’ or refusing to conform?</h2> <p>Kaysen did not anticipate the book’s reception at the time of its publication in 1993. It seemed to open readers up to tell their own stories, and they wrote to her from many places around the world to tell her about their hospitalisation. Looking back in a new edition published this year by Virago Books, she writes “it was surprising to me how many people had been in a mental hospital or had what used to be called a nervous breakdown”.</p> <p>When it appeared, her book was widely reviewed as “funny”, “wry”, “piercing” and “frightening”. Set out as a series of short vignettes, the book allowed readers the space to “insert themselves” into this story of human suffering.</p> <p>Investigating whether she had ever really been “crazy” – or just caught up in an oppressive approach to girls whose lives strayed from expectations – likely meant possible personal exposure, admission of frailty, and fear of judgement for Kaysen.</p> <p>Thirty years later, we have better understandings of trauma and of care for people with mental illness. So what can this book tell us now?</p> <p>Kaysen had waited almost three decades after these experiences before sharing her story in the early 1990s. This may be one reason it resonated with readers. The book was published at a time when most large institutions had closed as part of a worldwide trend towards deinstitutionalisation. Many people were starting to talk more openly about their own episodes of mental illness and recalling periods of hospitalisation that were sometimes grim and harrowing.</p> <p>By the 1990s, there was also much greater awareness of the uneven power relationships in psychiatric treatment. Women and girls, subject to gendered social expectations, have historically received different forms of medical and psychiatric treatment. Women have been described as “mad” for centuries when they refused to conform to gender norms.</p> <p>The book – an account of adolescent turmoil, with girlhood at the centre – can tell us about the lived experiences of teenage girls who face interior struggles over their mental health and wellbeing. Published in 1993 about the events of the late 60s, its insights are enduringly relevant.</p> <h2>A controversial diagnosis</h2> <p>In 1993, The New York Times ran an article titled “<a href="https://www.nytimes.com/1993/06/20/books/a-designated-crazy.html">A Designated Crazy</a>” that explained Kaysen had hired a lawyer to access her patient clinical records, 25 years after being at McLean. These appear in the book.</p> <p>Placed at intervals in the narrative, these notes show the objectifying medical practices of admission, collecting information and establishing a diagnosis. The information in these clinical pages is deeply personal. Sharing them is an act of resistance and defiance.</p> <p>“Needed McLean for [the past] 3 years ... Profoundly depressed – suicidal ... Promiscuous … might get herself pregnant ... Ran away from home ... Living in a boarding house.”</p> <p>Kaysen’s father, an academic at Princeton, wrote these notes in April 1967.</p> <p>In June 1967, the formal medical notes from her admitting doctor stated she had “a chaotic and unplanned life”, was sleeping badly, was immersed in “fantasy” and was isolated.</p> <p>Kaysen was admitted as “depressed”, “suicidal” and “schizophrenic”, with “borderline personality disorder”.</p> <p>While the psychiatric diagnoses used in the 1960s still exist, the borderline diagnosis is <a href="https://theconversation.com/borderline-personality-disorder-is-a-hurtful-label-for-real-suffering-time-we-changed-it-41760">now controversial</a>. Progressive psychologists and feminist psychologists are more likely to use the term “complex trauma”. Some of the other young women in the memoir had traumatic life experiences of sexual abuse and violence, which manifested as <a href="https://theconversation.com/how-many-people-have-eating-disorders-we-dont-really-know-and-thats-a-worry-121938">eating disorders</a> and <a href="https://theconversation.com/explainer-what-is-self-harm-and-why-do-people-do-it-11367">self harm</a>.</p> <p>Diagnostic labels have evolved over time. The first edition of the <a href="https://theconversation.com/explainer-what-is-the-dsm-and-how-are-mental-disorders-diagnosed-9568">Diagnostic and Statistical Manual</a> (DSM) was published in 1952. In 1967, the year of Kaysen’s committal, the DSM did not include “borderline personality disorder”, though the borderline concept had been <a href="https://www.press.jhu.edu/newsroom/dsm-history-psychiatrys-bible">theorised from the 1940s.</a></p> <h2>McLean’s famous patients</h2> <p>We can also read the book as an exposé of the controlling world of psychiatric institutions for people in the 1960s. The vast majority of people with psychiatric conditions were confined in public institutions, in often overcrowded conditions. Abuses happened, and violence was common.</p> <p>One distinction for those hospitalised at McLean in Boston, a private institution, was that it housed people whose families could afford the steep fees. Kaysen’s father had to declare his salary when he signed the paperwork. Famous patients included the mathematician <a href="https://theconversation.com/the-legacy-of-john-nash-and-his-equilibrium-theory-42343">John Forbes Nash</a> (whose story was told in the film, <a href="https://www.imdb.com/title/tt0268978/">A Beautiful Mind</a>), and New England poets Robert Lowell and <a href="https://theconversation.com/60-years-since-sylvia-plaths-death-why-modern-poets-cant-help-but-write-after-sylvia-199477">Sylvia Plath</a> in the late 1950s.</p> <p>McLean’s own “biography” is the subject of another book. <a href="https://www.theatlantic.com/magazine/archive/2002/01/the-asylum-on-the-hill/303058/">Gracefully Insane</a> shows its reputation as housing sometimes idiosyncratic and wealthy people whose families wanted them to be hidden, fearful of the stigma of mental illness in the family.</p> <p>Plath’s <a href="https://www.allenandunwin.com/browse/book/Sylvia-Plath-Bell-Jar-9780571268863">The Bell Jar</a> fictionalises her hospitalisation at McLean in the 1950s, following a suicide attempt.</p> <p>"Doctor Gordon’s private hospital crowned a grassy rise at the end of a long, secluded drive that had been whitened with broken quahog shells. The yellow clapboard walls of the large house, with its encircling verandah, gleamed in the sun, but no people strolled on the green dome of the lawn."</p> <p>Like Kaysen, Plath’s character Esther Greenwood has been involved in sexual relationships with men that made her uneasy, affecting her confidence and sense of self. Skiing with Buddy Willard, she falls and breaks her leg: “you were doing fine”, someone says, “until that man stepped into your path”.</p> <p>Later, floundering at college, she too is admitted by a male doctor acting on the advice of her mother: she has not slept, she is exhausted, she is not herself. He advises she needs shock therapy.</p> <p>In her new biography of Plath, <a href="https://www.penguin.com.au/books/red-comet-9781529113143">Red Comet</a>, Heather Clark describes McLean in the 1950s as reliant on shock therapy and activities, rather than psychoanalysis and careful therapeutic interventions. It was reputedly only a “notch above” a public institution, though it had the veneer of being for elite residents.</p> <p>Just a few years before Kaysen’s admission to McLean, Plath died by suicide in 1963, aged 30. The Bell Jar had been published one month earlier, under a pseudonym. By the late 1960s, teenage admissions were a focus for McLean’s doctors.</p> <p>Did adolesence present a new challenge for families and authorities, making young women vulnerable to institutionalisation?</p> <h2>Psychiatry and romantic love</h2> <p>Revisiting Girl, Interrupted, I am struck by its raw and honest recognition of the way women have sometimes experienced relationships with men as inherently oppressive. The structures of psychiatry and romantic love intersect throughout this book.</p> <p>Kaysen, like Plath, sees the family as a toxic institution. Male psychiatrists loom over both women, imposing in their authority to diagnose. “He looked triumphant”, wrote Kaysen of her doctor. “Doctor Gordon cradled his pencil like a slim, silver bullet”, wrote Plath.</p> <p>Women writing about their own madness has a long history. American writer Charlotte Perkins Gilman (1860–1935) penned the story <a href="https://www.goodreads.com/book/show/286957.The_Yellow_Wall_Paper">The Yellow Wallpaper</a> in The New England Magazine in 1892. It <a href="https://www.theguardian.com/artanddesign/2020/feb/07/charlotte-perkins-gilman-yellow-wallpaper-strangeness-classic-short-story-exhibition">tells the tale</a> of a woman’s mental and physical exhaustion following childbirth.</p> <p>Historians such as Elizabeth Lunbeck <a href="https://press.princeton.edu/books/paperback/9780691025841/the-psychiatric-persuasion">write about</a> the way a “psychiatric persuasion” came to dominate thinking about gender in the early 20th century. Psychiatrists began to see everyday life difficulties – such as the changes experienced during adolescence – as signalling illness (we might say, pathologising “normal” responses to stressful events). The rise of psychiatric expertise paralleled their professional reactions to women (and men) who struggled with life.</p> <p>In Australia, the history of “good and mad women” up to the 1970s by <a href="https://books.google.com.au/books/about/Good_and_Mad_Women.html?id=NIZ9QgAACAAJ&amp;redir_esc=y">Jill Julius Matthews</a> showed that women who experienced hospitalisation as a result of mental breakdown were perceived as having “failed” to meet the gendered expectations of them. Femininity and its constraints left some women unable to function or live authentic lives.</p> <h2>Institutions on film</h2> <p>Girl, Interrupted was released <a href="https://www.imdb.com/title/tt0172493/">as a film</a> by Columbia Pictures in 1999, with a cast of rising and established young actors, including Winona Ryder, Angelina Jolie and Brittany Murphy. It dramatised the interpersonal relationships inside the hospital described by Kaysen.</p> <p>The film script was not only the perfect vehicle for an ensemble cast of these women. It was also another opportunity to make mental illness visible on the screen. Another page-to-screen adaptation in 1975, Milos Forman’s film of Ken Kesey’s <a href="https://www.imdb.com/title/tt0073486/">One Flew Over the Cuckoo’s Nest</a>, brought to life the dramatic environment of institutional control and violence personified by the character of Nurse Ratched.</p> <p>Girl, Interrupted’s screenplay surfaced different women’s experiences of abuse, neglect, trauma and violence to explain their behaviours and responses to institutional constraints.</p> <p>Like One Flew Over the Cuckoo’s Nest, the film also emphasised the theme of resistance to institutional control. Patients hid pill medications under the tongue, broke into the hospital administration office to look at their case files, and found ways to circumvent the routines of institutional life. The film depicted the drama of group therapy, and the power dynamic between staff and patients.</p> <p>Not everyone who was institutionalised reacted the same way to being in hospital.</p> <p>Kaysen wrote "For many of us, the hospital was as much a refuge as it was a prison. Though we were cut off from the world and all the trouble we enjoyed stirring up out there, we were also cut off from the demands and expectations that had driven us crazy."</p> <p>A recent collaborative history of institutional care by Australian poet <a href="https://theconversation.com/secrecy-psychosis-and-difficult-change-these-lived-experiences-of-mental-illness-will-inspire-a-kaleidoscope-of-emotions-191011">Sandy Jeffs</a> and social worker Margaret Leggatt, <a href="https://podcasts.apple.com/am/podcast/out-of-the-madhouse-with-sandy-jeffs/id992762253?i=1000501765764">Out of the Madhouse</a>, challenges the idea of the institution as a place of alienation. Jeffs found community and solace at Larundel Hospital in Melbourne in the late 1970s and 1980s. However, the book also acknowledges this is not a universal response for institutionalised people.</p> <p>Like Kaysen, people with lived experiences of mental illness and hospitalisation have found it therapeutic to write about their personal challenges. For some, it provides an opportunity to embrace the “mad” identity, to find empathy for others. And to create a new self out of the chaos of mental breakdown.</p> <p><em>This article originally appeared on <a href="https://theconversation.com/girl-interrupted-interrogates-how-women-are-mad-when-they-refuse-to-conform-30-years-on-this-memoir-is-still-important-199211" target="_blank" rel="noopener">The Conversation</a>. </em></p> <p><em>Images: Getty</em></p>

Books

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“A special girl”: Orphaned crash victim receives bravery award for saving baby brothers

<p>Synthia Rose Day, a five-year-old girl from Western Australia, has received a Children of Courage award for her actions in the devastating crash that orphaned herself and her two younger brothers. </p> <p>Synthia was in the car with her mother Cyndi Braddock, Cyndi’s partner Jake Day, and her two brothers when their Land Rover left the road in Wheatbelt and flipped a handful of kilometres short of their home. Jake was 28, and Cyndi only 25. </p> <p>In the backseat with her little brothers, Synthia survived the accident, but the trio were not found for 55 hours in the wake of the tragedy despite a frantic search by both their loved ones and the local authorities. </p> <p>While the situation the children found themselves in was nothing short of devastating, Synthia stepped up, and took action to make sure her brothers got out of there okay. </p> <p>"She took the seatbelt off the one-year-old Charles,” the childrens’ uncle, Al Slatter, informed <em>9News</em>, “[she] got him out of the seat and then got her foot stuck so she couldn't move … and what she did for Bevan was amazing."</p> <p>The children, freed from the vehicle and watched over by young Synthia, were eventually found on the roadside. </p> <p>For her actions that day, Synthia has been presented with a Children of Courage award, and was nominated by her teacher, Tony Smeed.</p> <p>“She's always been a caring and compassionate person,” Smeed said of the decision to put Synthia forward for the award, “and obviously the bravery she showed in 50 hours of heat to keep her brothers alive was just amazing.”</p> <p>“The award will mean that much to her,” their uncle, Al Slatter added, “and I even had a tear in my eye when they read it out to me, because she’s a special girl.”</p> <p>Synthia’s beloved brothers - two-year-old Bevan and one-year-old Charles - were in attendance to support their hero big sister, and the family had to travel more than three hours from their home in Kondinin to Perth to attend the ceremony. </p> <p>Slatter also opened up to <em>9News </em>about Synthia’s attitude since the tragedy, as the children adjust to their lives in their grandparents’ care, saying, “Charles, she loves him, but Bevan, wherever he goes - if he’s out riding his pushbike out the front - she’s got to be out there checking on him, making sure he’s not too far from Nanny.”</p> <p>Synthia was one of 38 exceptional children across Western Australia to be recognised for demonstrating resilience, determination, and positivity while living with trauma and various health challenges. </p> <p><em>Images: 9News</em></p>

Family & Pets

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Little girl praised for shielding baby brother for 36 hours in quake

<p>A seven-year-old girl and her younger brother have been rescued after a 7.8 magnitude quake in southeast Turkey and northern Syria destroyed their home and trapped them beneath tonnes of heavy concrete. </p> <p>Mariam and Ilaaf, along with the rest of their family, were asleep at home in Besnaya-Bseineh, a small village in Haram, Syria, when the Monday quake occurred. It is believed the siblings were confined in the debris for 36 gruelling hours before rescuers located them. </p> <p>Footage has emerged of the moment the children were found, and has revealed that despite the horrors of their situation, Mariam had one priority - protecting her little brother. Their father has since informed reporters that Illaf’s name is an Islamic one meaning ‘protection’. </p> <p>With an arm sheltering his head and covering his face from the dust and debris, Mariam can be seen stroking Ilaaf’s hair in what some believe to be the remains of their bed. A concrete slab lies precariously above them, pinning the two to the spot. </p> <p>“Get me out of here,” Mariam pleads to the rescuers in the now viral clip, “I’ll do anything for you.” </p> <p>To the relief of millions, the children were pulled safely from the scene of the disaster, and transferred to hospital to receive medical treatment. </p> <blockquote class="twitter-tweet"> <p dir="ltr" lang="en">While under the rubble of her collapsed home this beautiful 7yr old Syrian girl has her hand over her little brothers head to protect him.<br />Brave soul<br />They both made it out ok. <a href="https://t.co/GrffWBGd1C">pic.twitter.com/GrffWBGd1C</a></p> <p>— Vlogging Northwestern Syria (@timtams83) <a href="https://twitter.com/timtams83/status/1623060122695004169?ref_src=twsrc%5Etfw">February 7, 2023</a></p></blockquote> <p>UN representative Mohamad Safa took to Twitter to urge people to “share positivity” in light of the rescue. With a death toll in the thousands - a number only predicted to rise - and aid a desperate need, the siblings’ story has become a moment of bittersweet brightness in a time of tragedy. </p> <p>Around the world, people who heard their story have taken to social media to praise Mariam for her bravery, hailing her as a hero for her actions and love in a time of disaster. </p> <p>“Oh bless her,” tweeted one,  “children's love and resilience makes me weep.”</p> <p>“Miracles happen. What a great big sister. Lovingly protective under such stressful circumstances,” wrote another. “Hope for all those still trapped. Respect for all the rescuers working tirelessly.”</p> <p>Their father, Mustafa Zuhir Al-Sayed, has confirmed that their family - he, his wife, and their three children - were asleep when it all happened. </p> <p>“We felt the ground shaking,” he said, “and rubble began falling over our heads, and we stayed two days under the rubble. We went through, a feeling, a feeling I hope no one has to feel.”</p> <p>“People heard us,” he explained, after recounting how he and his family prayed for someone to find them, “and we were rescued – me, my wife and the children. Thank God, we are all alive and we thank those who rescued us.”</p> <p><em>Images: Twitter</em></p> <p> </p>

Caring

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The secret meaning behind flowers

<p>From beautiful wedding bouquets and congratulatory flowers at graduation to a bunch offered in remorse, flowers play an important part in our lives. There are many occasions and reasons why we might want to give someone flowers. But did you know that all flowers have meanings behind them? In the Victorian era, flowers were symbols and people gave specific flowers to convey specific messages. As they could not openly express themselves, flowers were almost like a secret language. Here we uncover the meaning behinds some popular flowers so next time you’re picking out some to give to a loved one, you can make sure the message matches your thoughts!</p> <p><strong>Daffodils</strong></p> <p>These bright and happy flowers symbolise regard. They are also associated with new beginnings, eternal life and unrequited love. A single daffodil indicates misfortune but a whole bunch of them means happiness.</p> <p><strong>Peonies</strong></p> <p>These feminine flowers signal bashfulness. However, when a bride carries them they indicate a happy marriage and good fortune. On the other hand, peonies can also be used to express shame or indignation.</p> <p><strong>Hydrangeas</strong></p> <p>This wildflower symbolises understanding. Give them to someone when you want to express gratitude.</p> <p><strong>Gardenias</strong></p> <p>The elegant gardenia signifies purity, beauty and sweetness. Unsurprisingly then they are popular at wedding ceremonies. Giving someone gardenias can indicate a secret love or a way of telling them you think they are sweet and lovely.</p> <p><strong>Carnations</strong></p> <p>These popular flowers are available in a variety of colours and each one signifies something different. Pink symbolises enduring love – particularly a mother’s love for her child. Purple means unpredictability and red – admiration and an aching heart. White carnations represent pure love and if you ever need to politely decline a lover, striped carnations indicate a regretful refusal.</p> <p><strong>Rose</strong></p> <p>Everyone knows red roses mean romantic love but many people don’t know other colours have quite different meanings. Dark red is associated with mourning whereas pink represents happiness. Although very pretty, yellow roses actually indicate jealousy.</p> <p><strong>Tulips</strong></p> <p>These popular flowers stand for perfect love. Conveying grace and elegance, giving someone tulips is a declaration of love.</p> <p><strong>Orchids</strong></p> <p>These tropical blossoms symbolise exotic beauty. Those looking to make a lasting impression should consider these rare and delicate flowers.</p> <p><strong>Iris</strong></p> <p>The meaning of the iris includes faith, hope, wisdom and eloquence. Purple irises are associated with wisdom and compliments whereas blue ones symbolise faith and hope.</p> <p><em>Image: Getty Images</em></p>

Home & Garden

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7 tips to make fresh flowers last longer

<p>It’s always such a nice treat to have fresh flowers in the house – whether they’ve been bought for you by a special someone, you’ve treated yourself, or you’ve just cut them straight from your very own garden. But many people don’t know the correct way to look after a bunch of flowers to ensure they get to enjoy their beauty for as long as possible. So here are some simple tips to remember.</p> <ol> <li>Start with the right kind of vase. Don’t try to cram too many flowers into a small vase – make sure the flowers have room to open fully so you can see as much of them as possible.</li> <li>Remove any low-hanging leaves. You don’t want any leaves to be sitting in the water, so be sure to prune them before putting your bouquet into your vase.</li> <li>Change the water daily. Flowers don’t like to sit in the same water day after day.</li> <li>Trim the stems. Every few days, trim the stems a little, cutting at an angle.</li> <li>Keep the flowers away from direct heat and sunlight. A room that is too warm will lead to wilted flowers, so be sure to choose somewhere that stays cool if possible. If you really want to stretch things, consider keeping the flowers in your fridge when you’re not in the house.</li> <li>When flowers start to wilt, remove any that don’t look so hot and transfer the bouquet to a smaller vase to freshen things up.</li> <li>If you’re left with just one or two late-opening blooms, you can float it in a decorative teacup full of water.</li> </ol> <p><em>Image: Getty</em></p>

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